MEME MONDAY: I don't gift on christmas
Well, Christmas is around the corner and though I grew up thinking Christmas was about gift giving because that is just what happened. On December 25th in the morning you open gifts from under the tree which you probably peeked at. Sometimes when we couldnt wait, we asked if it was okay to open the gifts at midnight. The answer was always yes. Family members would say you'll get Christmas presents if you are well behaved but you got them anyway because you don't NOT gift the kids. Because of all of the food, warmth, and time spend with long lost cousins I only saw at family gatherings, I grew up loving the holidays. As I started getting older (and broker, because, well, school and sneakers), I started evaluating what Christmas meant to me as a child and what it means to me now and basically:
I realized Christmas, well the holidays in general (Thanksgiving-New Years) is about TIME spent and not MONEY spent. Trust me, I know its hard to decline gifts or even to introduce the idea that it’s just as gratifying to be in a living room, listening to music with the smell of warm food, having conversations and building memories with your loved ones. But I learned that is what primarily matters to me. Aside from the mushy stuff, buying gifts can be expensive and the act can actually develop into slight pettiness depending on who you are gifting or who you are not gifting and how much it costs compared to the gift that was given to you. See? I just feel like gifts add this entirely EXTRA component that we can do without. Imagine NOT spending $1,000 plus on Christmas gifts and instead of putting that towards your credit cards, passion project or self-care. Would your family and friends understand that you are trying to stay healthy and financially comfortable so that you can make sure everyone is good today and in the future? Would they understand if you put those $300 towards a credit card or school supplies for your little brother or sister? Would your family understand that you have a goal to make your life what you want it to be? If you answered no to any or all questions, it is now especially crucial to rethink gifts on Christmas as being the main event.
I am glad Yanely brought up this issue in our culture and in society. It might seem cheap and ugly to not get your mom an Apple watch or get your girl the new iPhone X but debt is uglier. Yanley makes that clear and shares how she managed to do this with little to no criticism from her family and friends (at least never to her face!).
Ok so what if you are sitting there thinking, "it's not that deep, Amanda." I respect that. Again I love the holidays, I always have and I will probably give one gift or two because I have two sisters, and my mom is a queen so she deserves everything especially on Christmas but my grandma is the light of our lives so I am probably going to get her something too. My partner and I just have to get each other something, we have been together 10 years and know each other so well that it is so easy and quite pleasurable to shop for one another. Then I have my stepmom, my older brother, my favorite co-workers, the neighbor who always holds it down. I might get a new toy for my dog so she can unwrap her gifts while we unwrap ours. OMG! I almost forgot my seven favorite cousins, my stepdad, my favorite aunt. And I still haven't considered my girlfriends and a couple of Secret Santa games...
Ha! Look, ultimately, our time is most important and actually priceless and I rather spend my time with you than my money on you. Is that okay?
CHAT WITH US
Do you like to gift on Christmas? Do you feel guilty for spending too much on gifts and New Year outfits? Is gifting very special to you? Do gifts mean more than material things and money to you? Let us know!